Given the current situation and intermittently having time on my side I have been appraising my life, this blog and other things.
My life has changed a great deal since I started this blog, for one thing I got married. I also had a spiritual epiphany, moved house twice, got a dog (yeah historically not a dog person, you have no idea). In addition I lost my mother and other tragedies.
The most important thing in my life is my wife who is the reason and inspiration for much of what I do. For many reasons I rarely write about her or us. The biggest reason I don’t is that I often have trouble connecting to my feelings I think. If you read my stories you may have sensed a certain detachment in many of my heroes. Life is so much easier when you write your own script.
Indigo used to have a very successful blog under a different name, but an envious sociopath stalker threw a hand-grenade into our lives and my wife retreated from all that. She used to write emotional witty pieces that inspired so many. She was so much better than I at the meaning of this-thing-we-do. I would love her to come back to it, but she is not ready.
Before I met her I think marrying a woman who shared my interests would have been the greatest thing. It is, for sure, but she is not a character in a story and my life with her is far more than that. Having a sub-Dom relationship with a real woman is not easy and sometimes it falls apart altogether. In real life I am not so good at it. Life, marriage and a spanking relationship is like a good garden: it takes a lot of work and sometimes there is more manure than roses.
In future I may try and explore more of who I am and amid the stories and reportage I may write more introspective pieces. I hope that doesn’t sound too pretentious or self-indulgent, but I rarely take time to write properly these days and maybe I should use some of that effort to develop rather than produce just light sketches.